Love Language

Structureless thoughts in spring

Photo by Oksana Savinova on Unsplash

New creatures ready to grow
catalpa beans
crunch under my shoes
crunch in my dog’s jaw.

A gray sky in motion
rain drops seldomly
matches my inspiration.

Sun peeks out
like now is your moment
do what you’ve got to do.

We’re all waiting for you.

Pain come forward,
settle at the crown
furrow my brow.

It’s the same me
whatever you intended to do
doesn’t follow through.

It’s a fresh wound
I can’t quite describe
the prettiest kind of nostalgia.

I want to trace
I want to fill in the empty spaces
I want to float on the surface—

my hair intertwined with the seaweed,
fingertips soaked in sunshine,
knees caught in the breeze.

Don’t take that from me.

Wondering why
it took twenty years
to remember to watch the clouds.

What else did I miss?

Some people weigh on my mind
like a migraine only silence and dark can cure.

Some people make chills chase my pulse.

Some people hold my breath over me.

Some people strangle
trying to get it out of me.

But no one’s going to dream of me
unless I’ve got something to give them.

No one will ever love me as much as I love them.

I take it too far
I go overboard
I’ll forgive you indefinitely—
the fawning that got wired into me.

My love language being
let me say something
wrong
something ridiculous
laugh with me
sing for me—

don’t turn away
when things get less than
thrilling—

even when
you see me try
you know
I like to chase the changes too.

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More poems by Lila Cave-Park:

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